they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
