Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
