No more Irish car bombs ever.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
