Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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