So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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