don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
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