just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
