I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
