yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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