theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
