i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
