words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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