So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
