I want to make a zoo with you.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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