Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize