Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
It's official drugs can't kill me
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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