ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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