he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
