do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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