Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
