problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
