Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
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I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
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I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
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