Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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