she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Randomize