I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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