Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
should my penis look like a turkey
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Randomize
