We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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