called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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