Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
