Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
