I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
love makes seman taste better
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
there is glitter all over my balls
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