Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize