At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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