Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
