I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
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