but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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