Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
