I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
