I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize