he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
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