We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
