just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize