Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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