I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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