WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
