I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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