I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
No subtext here. People are naked.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
