this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
