I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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