Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize